=S

Hmmm...I won't say I'm good in predicting but this time I'm so certain that my prediction six months ago is RIGHT. I won't want to volunteer because I want him to know that I'm the one who is running the club for the past six months. Both internal and external. At least show something la...

The abandoned dream

I dreamed of a weird dream.

A dream I made to myself many years back.

And strange it appeared in my dream this many years later.

I still remember the dream.

A dream that few people would make.

And I shall find some courage to chase after it again.

I must push myself

A challenging journey awaits

And talk to myself,"giving up is not an option."

永怀育中

爸退休了

我放下了手头上的事务，回家参加爸的退休仪式。花车，诗歌朗诵，歌咏，舞蹈，还有我的“徒妹”-两只小猪上台表演扯铃（还有华乐团在旁伴奏），好不风光。爸几度感动落泪。

吃了饭，回到家，拆礼物，有同事送的，有学生送的，三机构，县教局等。这应该是爸一生中收到最多礼物的一天。

下午，客厅只有我和爸。爸拿起一件件的礼物，打开了又收起，脸上不断散发出无限的喜悦。后来，还不停的告诉我学校有什么可以改进的地方。

突然发现，最爱育群中学的人，不是那些在别人面前炫耀自己为育中做了多少贡献，牺牲，而是兢兢业业三十五年的老爸。爸把大半生的时间都贡献给育中，任劳任怨，默默耕耘，鞠躬尽瘁。

我的眼眶，也湿了。

至少，我在育群中学就读时，没有让爸丢脸。

忘了说：“爸，你很帅！”

first dive

It was last week. Things were busy as usual except for one. Jing Yi took part in a swimming competition. YES. Swimming, not running.

Three weeks back a friend called me, she asked me to join the swimming team in relay, women's medley team. They were lacking one swimmer and the only thing they knew was that I went to the swimming pool at least once a week this semester.

AND SO, they assumed that 'JING YI CAN SWIM'. This is quite ridiculous as I learned swimming when I was in F6 and it was only during the holidays when I can go to my cousin's condominium pool to do so. I knew only breaststroke and backstroke and they wanted me to do freestyle! How can I make it happen in two weeks' time?

AND SO, they assumed that with some practice in the pool, 'JING YI CAN SWIM LIKE THE WAY SHE RUNS'. I began to hit the pool in the evenings, try to learn some instant freestyle. After several days of mouthful of pool water, I did it. But it was rather slow, slower than my breaststroke.

AND SO, just one day before the competition, I met my captain with the rest of the teammates and they watched me swim. Somehow I think they were disappointed with me but it was too late to change. So, they decided to let me do the backstroke. Despite being the weak link, I imagined myself as Michael Phelps and Ian Thorp once I dive into the pool.

Oh well, at least we got bronze medal out of 4 teams competing. Thanks for the FIRST DIVE, I learned freestyle in three days.

10

This year’s SUKMUM(sukan mahasiswa UM) marked an important milestone in my life as a runner. 10 years and it’s been a long journey. Despite being an individual runner, I realized that there is no one man show in life. You can become the best only when you have a strong team behind you, supporting you and walk you through those hardships. The team makes up of:

1. Your coach, the ones who never tell you about how great they were and just want you to be greater than them.

2. Your parents, the ones who will go to your every race if possible, call you the night before the competition to give you some moral support and encourage you to leave home for one week for national tournament but deep down in their hearts they want you to stay at home.

3. Your siblings and relatives, the ones who always congratulate you after they heard about your victory and if they present by the race track, they will shout their lungs out.

4. Your friends, the ones who is not classified as enemy that will keep cheering for you and telling you that other competitors are right behind you even though you are 50m ahead of them.

5. Your competitor, the ones who let you know that you are not good enough; winner takes it all which makes you a stronger, tougher runner on the next meet up.

6. Last but not the least, your teammates, the ones who suffer the hardcore training and taste the sweetness of success together with you. They give you shoulders when you are down, push yourself to limits beyond your expectation.

The team I have is simply too amazing. Although there are hard times that I want to give up on myself, they have inspired me to perform better. 10 years and looking back, I have change, a lot. The friendship, life lesson makes a better me.

This is the 2 gold medals I won in SUKMUM this year ended today and I would like to highlight a special appreciation to Cikgu Norzah who got injured in an accident recently. The one who makes me believe that I'm better than what I think I was, gives me wing to fly up high and most importantly, teaches me to be a positive and humble person in life.

nervous is good

Haih...the same old nervousness again. I'll be racing for 10km on Saturday and I can feel that the nerves are building up.

Experience, what is it actually? Why do I still feel so nervous everytime before a race? I have a lot of race experience and why am I nervous? These are the questions frequently asked to myself.

Soon, as those experience grown into wisdom, I learnt that is good to feel nervous. That means I still want to win. Being an experienced runner doesn't mean you don't feel nervous about racing, it's how you turn those stresses and pressure into nervousness that can boost you to victory. Those winning instinct started to come back again and I would like to taste the fruit of success. At least top 3 this time. Hmm...it's a small race after all. Grrr...

On second thought, top 10 is good enough for me. I prefer a slow and consistent start.

IQ zero days

I felt like a stupid these few days, even my lecturers and coursemates said so.

How to say? pH=-log[H+] and when you have HCl of 2.0M, you will get pH in negative value. Hmm...isn't that pH is scaled from 1 to 14. This was out of scale. It took me days to figure out the answer, that was after I seek answer from Lin Hui and Google.

Second thing, I accidentally, unconciously wrote my friend's name when signing the lecture attendance. How idiot! =S

Next thing, I realised I lost all my integration skill that I got all wrong in my quiz! Absolutely stupid. The fat fat lecturer said it was a silly mistake. Then I asked my friend,"am I stupid?" and she said,"Yes, you are!" =(

Finally, mom bought me a pair of sandals and she said they can last for years. I proved her wrong when I brushed my foot against the road while looking for parking this morning. And I ended up walking like a penguin whole day.

Enough of those stupidness I got myself into. I think I need to figure some ways to stop it. One way is to stop learning as some people say,'the more you learn, more stupid you get'. The other way is to keep learning because some other people say,'experience is the best teacher'. What? Too stupid to decide on that...

The path I refuse to take

I always remember that she once told me,"Budak yang ikhlas ialah budak yang akan berjaya." I don't have many mentors in my life and she is one of the very few who guides me through the years. I follow her guidance but somehow I find it hard to apply it in my uni life.

People take your effort for granted and you should be thankful when they don't take your effort as their effort. I have seen enough and I have ___how to say? Evolved? Evolve to become more adaptable to this cruel environment. Yes, the world is not round and there is nothing you can do to make the world goes round. At least I have learnt to be a little bit more selfish and 'cunning as a fox' so that I don't get taken for granted by others easily.

Someone says that don't judge a book by its cover but trust me, some people can be judged from the first impression and I get it right sometimes. Next thing, becareful of the way of speaking and doing things because eyes are watching. One small mistake and the whole world will know.

I may sound scary and very much a plotter but that is how I behave only when I feel threatened. You know, the survivor instinct. I'm still the old me who is quiet yet noisy, smile too little with strangers and an obedient follower.

to smile or not to smile =S

This semester's time table is completely wierdo. I have one hour class and 3 hours lab on Monday and no class at all on Friday but Tuesday to Thursday is a torn of mind. I don't even want to talk about it.

Tuesday, I will have back to back classes from 11am to 7pm ( no lunch at all); Wednesday 9am to 5pm (with one hour of lunch break), thinking that the day might be over, Toastmaster meeting follows right after the class and if I exclude the exco meeting, it would been a merry day if the meeting finishes by 8pm; Wednesday might have been hard but wait till you see Thurday. It's an early morning class at 8am, followed by a non-stop marathon of lecture from 11am to 5pm. It's not the end yet, the two hours killer subject by the infamous Baharuddin continues at 8pm.

Hopefully I don't get skinny (skip lunch) or fatty (bulk dinner) in the end of the semester.

And Friday and the rest of my weekend are heaven-days for me to sleep as much as I want to prepare myself for another torturous week to come. I can hardly describe the time table. Yes, I want holiday on Friday but I don't like to have marathon-like lecture on the other days. @_@

The mountain beyond the clouds

Strange, I wrote 2 posts within these few days but I have to keep those amazing memories and experiences before I'm too busy to remember. Today is the second day of my third year and I already have many paper works to do. Oh, I wished I can stay at Sabah for few more days. Miss the calm sea and silent mountains because they are so soothing to look at.


Today is the 5th day after the climb to the peak as well. I set only one target for Mount Kinabalu adventure, that is the Low's Peak which is the highest point of the mountain. And yes, I did it. It was just 10 days before I found out about this trip and took me less than 3 seconds to decide, I never regreted.


I couldn't find a word to describe. If I have to say, it's simply AMAZING. There are so many wonderful things in the mountain that you have to see for yourself. Megabiodiversity, environment, the hike, the rock and many more that we don't get to see in everyday life. This is certainly an eye-opening experience for those who love the natural environment and wish to escape from the busy-hussle life.


I climbed the 4th highest mountain in Malay Archipelago and it makes me want for more. I'm looking for another mountain beyond the clouds, probably after I graduate and have some financial stability because mountain climbing can be costly sometimes. =)


I never know my limit until I put myself to the ultimate challenge. I want those activities and adventure to fill my life and experience until I'm too old to do so.


Finally, looking back in those photos reminds me of the poster in Lin Hui's study table 'Your attitude determines your altitude' the mind is the factor that brought me to the peak of the mountain.

The land below the wind

This was my first flight and the destination was Sabah. The first thing I noticed was all the plat number on the cars start with S and end with alphabet (A,K,Y etc)

I came here just to climb the mountain. Yup, Mount Kinabalu. On the way, I felt quite comfortable because I was worrying about getting cultural shock here. It turned out to be fine. Well, except for the Catholic churches, I accounted over 20 of them and only 2 mosques on the way to Kinabalu Park.

Hmmm...I kinda love this place as it is very peaceful and secured, unlike those busy and never-ending business back in uni life. This is definately the type of vacation detination before I end my sophomore year and start my third year. The state capital city, Kota Kinabalu, is a nice city, the size is just like Teluk Intan or Kuala Lumpur in the 70's.

I know I will return for more.

To the rescue

It has been years since I rear dog. Months ago, two stray dogs came to my home and became our house dog. The male dog is named CharSio (although sometimes my dad would call it GehQiang, meaning toothpick) and the female one is named Mary (but I insist calling it Maria for some unexplainable reasons =S). CharSio is naughty, energetic and playful while Maria is more gentle and shy. The dogs have become a part of my family. (although I don’t really take them in as much as my little sisters because stray dogs are very independent and like to switch area sometimes, so they may leave the home anytime)

Last Saturday evening, I took two plates of food to feed them. CharSio was waiting at the front door as usual but Maria did not. I gave one plate of the food to CharSio as I called out Maria’s name all over the compound but she was nowhere to be seen. I thought she might have gone to the food centre nearby for some stray food so I kept the food till the bedtime and decided to feed CharSio with Maria’s share.

The next day my whole family went to Puchong to install and paint our new house. Before we leave the house, Maria was still away. Since the dog was a stray dog, it would be normal that it went out for snack like it always did.

Tuesday, we packed for home. On the way, we had BakKutTeh as lunch at Klang and stopped at Bukit Melawati for awhile before heading home. On the way, mom said that Maria might have left the home to other places. Made sense. When we reach home, CharSio welcomed us with his tail wigging, accompanied by XiaoTou. (a newcomer dog with a very small body size) Still, Maria was absent.

As I walked to the gate, I heard dog barking from a distance. I was so sure that it was Maria. Zhuang, Mom and I quickly walked to the sound. We found Maria in the final, locked in the bedroom of an empty house which is a few units from my house. She rushed out from the house, greeted by CharSio with happy barks which I can tell from the way he jumped around Maria’s skinny body. I noticed she had several wounds all over her body.

Who in the hack in this world would have done that to a kind dog? Heartless, cruel and totally inhumane. She must have been locked in the house since last Saturday, four days without food and water. I was curious of why the dog did not give any responds when I was looking for her that Saturday.

We fed her with a loaf of bread brought from Tesco and of course, CharSio shared the reward. The evening was a peaceful and happy one.

The Big Dipper

I was looking at the sky. Venus was so bright even it was just after sunset. And the most obvious star group that I could watch was the Big Dipper. Slowly I walked to the basketball court and enjoyed this peaceful moment. It was so nice and reminded me of the night I slept under the bright full moon in Langkawi during Wilderness Adventure and the other night I blanketed myself with billions of stars and cotton candy clouds during Outward Bound, Lumut.

=the big dipper=from google image=

Many people know that I like outdoor activities, out there playing in the natural environment, doing extreme activities and testing my strength and power. Yup, I lead people across the sea in kayaks even I never do it before and not knowing how to swim, walked through thick jungle with compass and map for the first time ever, I made them shelters that can withstand heavy rain, gathered firewood at the midnight with a parang and a headlight, pulled a one tonne whaler boat to the shore, cooked and watched the night with two other girls while the guys were snoring inside their camp. I always take things as a challenge--the more I do, the more I learn and the stronger I'm gonna be. I become stronger--physically, socially and most importantly, psychology.

They may not know that the best moment from these activities is when I feel connected to the nature. The breeze, sounds made by the plants and animals when I close my eyes. The beaches, islands, mountains I may never get to discover that I had conquered one by one. Breathtaking sunrises and sunsets. It doesn't matter if I need to become a leader in a group of strangers even when I'm the minority one or do more work than other group members during camp out. It is because very seldom you get the chance to go for these outdoors for free. I enjoyed every second I have with the environment. I'm always awake during camping in the wild because I scare if I might miss out any beautiful moment that I can seldom find in the civilized world.

Suddenly, I miss those campouts so badly. I dream of going back in time and wish I never wake up. I'm so glad that I found the CD I got from my trainer in Wilderness Adventure. Me leading the team... =) That day was Miss Lin Hui's birthday and I met her at the base camp. I was so happy but she refused to give me a hug. (T_T)

Group photo - Capella (name after a star in the galaxy)

It was full moon on the last day.

A memo I made for Outward Bound. =D

New babe

I love running shoes but at the same time I need to hate them. This is because all of them won’t last more than 2 years. Sports stuffs are the things that would make me spend generously. The most expensive purchase was my Taekwondo uniform (250 bucks) but it will last for many many many years because my previous uniform was worn by my eldest and elder sisters. Yup, I’m the third party and that old uniform is still in good shape after what?! 15 years!!! The toughest clothes ever in human history. The best buy I had ever done was my lovely Reeboks in red but it is going to retire soon. It cost only 175 bucks after 50% discount.

=Reeboks Red when I first bought it on March 2009=
Sunday was a pretty sunny day so it was the best time to stuck yourself in a shopping mall. I went to al-ikhsan, to look for a new ‘baby’. After one hour of comparing and testing, annoying the salesgirl, I decided to buy a pair of new shoes, it’s called Nike Air. She should thanked me for the commission she got from the purchase. Money's gone, baby's here (I’m not going to tell you the price =P) How long can it last under my feet?

=Nike Blue bought on 23 May 2010=

So excited I tested it on Monday, Tuesday and today is the third day. Nike Air has better traction but my Reeboks is more comfy. However, that’s because it is new and I think I’ve well-adapted to the shoes so as the shoes to me now. But after today’s running, I noticed that my ‘baby’ is dirty, stained by red laterite of the field track. =( Yeah~so what? This is the faith that you have to accept if you become my running shoes. ;)

=Posing with my signature pose during competition=

Good pair of shoes definitely improves running and protects the feet (if I still want to walk when I get old) and this is the reason why I insist the best for my sports footwear.

Trip Memo

After this hectic semester, all of us want to have something special to say bye bye to our 2nd year. We had a 2days 1night outing. So after the trip, I decided to highlight some special moment of the trip so I make the photos into video. After many trials, I finally uploaded this video(after I compressed it into smaller file size)



Ancient fortress? Good food? Biodiversity?Beautiful hill? Mangrove swamps? Pretty beaches? Endless paddy fields? Paranormal activities? Ask Selangor and here’s the answer. From Klang to Kuala Selangor and Sekinchan, we had tasted delicacies that these places are famous for. The swamp, hill, beach and paddy field, indescribable is the only word. We watched the sunset and celebrated the night under the Christmas trees, unwrapping surprises one by one. We played too much and took too 'few' photos, just try to be low profile like KES does. LOL...what's next?


This is the second video I made one week after the first one.

The athletic side of us, playing and acting...in our own world. Plus some funny photos of us during the trip to end up this video. =)

Frankly speaking, this was the third time I brought friends to my hometown. (First time was with Ing Ting and Sze Yhinn while the second time was my ex-roomie, Yee Len) This time, I think I showed them almost everything they can see with the limited time.

In a nutshell, it was a memorable trip indeed. And for sure, this trip had enhanced our friendships.

A day of hope and miracle

Today is the 20th day I am staying in Sekinchan this year. For a person who is studying in Kuala Lumpur, this is a really scary statistics and seriously, I don't feel like a Sekinchan person anymore. By the way, I finally get to have some rest and good time at home. Throughout this busy 2nd year, I have learned a valuable lesson - no matter how busy life is running, never ever forget your family.
Afternoon, I had some entertainment watching Uber Cup final. I seldom felt so restless watching sports, shouting the lungs out of my mouth and sweating(due to the hot weather), not even while I was watching the Thomas Cup Semifinal (Malaysia vs China) yesterday. Most people would expect that China to win since they have the world's top players in the lineout. But the Korean shocked the world proving that even they may not have the best players, the fastest smashes, they have the biggest heart than any other players today. They won 3-1 against the Great Wall of China. They fought with courage and spirit that no words can describe, I saluted them with "my head and four limbs on the ground".
I think China failed to handle the pressure when they lost the first point to Korea and didn't regain strength to overcome the spirit of Korean players. This is what happened when we were put under pressure. Certain pressure can push us to strive upon our limit but once it exceed the limit, we will break no matter how strong or powerful you are.
I don't practice any religion but I have self-belief. And most of my self-belief is gained from the sports I played and sometimes I am emo, specifically agressive and cool. (*I think most sports people behave like me. Maybe that's why I don't talk much while playing sports - self meditating, acting cool and playing psychology game, I guess. LOL...) I felt inspired watching ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Thanks to the Korean. Now I know that I must not push myself too hard sometimes because my friends told me that my face is damned scary when I get serious. I should manage stress in a better way. (*no more scary face next time, I try)

Believe the unbelievable, achieve the unachievable. I can because I believe and I can achieve it.

~cherish~

I read through a meaningful story and would like to share...

To those who are married, .. Not married .. and soon to be married, I hope you will be touched with this story... MARRIAGE When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce.. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning.. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully..

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead.. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

\(>,<)/

It's the busiest semester yet. Now is the exam period and I feel that my busy life is taking a hit on my academic performance. I struggled in the last 2 papers and still have 4 more to go. I don't know what's going on with myself, seem to have lost my direction. I don't want to lost my dean's list title again like last year. Sometimes, I don't really understand myself. I can be very sporty and relax with sports but very competitive and serious when it comes to academic. What if I have double identity like Jekyll and Hyde? lol...
By the way, semester break is just around the corner and I'm looking forward for a good rest and meeting up with old friends again. =) GO ON, JING YI !

(correction : ok, maybe I am competitive in both sports and academic but it's totally different when I deal with it. =P)

thinking...

I've been with UM Toastmasters Club for 3 semesters. I admit that I've learned a lot from this club.

Last Saturday while I was still having my beauty sleep, (although it was already 11am) I received a call from a friend. He is no other than Ras Hadi, the president to be next year for the club.

"Hi there, Jing Yi, can I have a minute with you?" before he continued, I knew what he was going to tell me, and I was right. "Yes, go ahead," I replied. " Thank you for being with Toastmasters Club all this while and I would like to offer you a post, Vice President of Education that is. If you want to know, this is the second highest post in the club." I was thinking how to reply him. This is a very good opportunity as Toastmaster is an internationally-chartered organization, an eye-opening experience for a new 'Competent Communicator' like me. "When do you need my reply?", "By opening of next semester?"

I am thinking all the things that can happen to me. I can go for many competitions and meet more great speakers like my club advisors or even better. This requires a lot of planning as I have a feel that I might become club president the year after and it means representing UM for competition. Am I good enough to take on those great speakers out there. The previous presidents of this club have good english backgrounds and I'm just a typical chinese-educated people. I know I have improve since I join Toastmaster but not good enough like them. The ex-president represented Malaysia in ASEAN English Seminar in Singapore, the current president won many competitions and is the best speaker in division level (same as state level) and Hadi has yet to prove himself.

Am I thinking too much?

Should I accept the challenge?

What's next?

I've been busy throughout the semester.For the first 7 weeks, I'd put most of my time for MKTH, Design, Diabolo, SUKMUM, PC Fair and Larian Gemilang. At some point I really felt short of breath. But I wouldn't say that I'm tired, just I hope that everything don't come together at once. Some people told me that activities are just waste of time. I disagree...Imagine if I spent all my free time in my room studying, interneting, I'll definately go crazy. I'm the kind of people who cannot sit still and I rather walk around places than to sit in front of my desk.
I learned a lot things from all the activities I joined. I learn to smile in trouble and take things easier. I manage to conquer my stage fright (to certain extend) and I think I'm one of the most well-known people among the chinese in my college. They know me for my artistic skill (from MKTH Design), the dare devil (from Diabolo), athletic (from SUKMUM and Larian Gemilang) and "English-ed slang???" (from Toastmaster)...well, I should tell them I've more than that, maybe they will realise my martial art skill next semester (I consider to take Taekwondo for my co-curiculum in the coming semester because I found a friend that share the same fever like me)
I only have 4 years of university life and I'm now already in my 2nd year. After that, I'll need to face the world of reality, WORK~! So, why not enjoy my university life to the max? Life is too short to be miserable...note that!

~Diabolo~

I still remember the day they performed on stage for the first time...seeing my hardwork paid off in the best reward, I almost cried that time...They are great and possesed more talent than me. They will become a better team than mine...

Time really flies...I've been in charge of Diabolo for almost one year and it is time to past our batons to juniors. We are going to have a meeting today to seriously discuss on the future path that we are going to take and challenges we are going to face...

Somewhere deep in my heart feels that I won't be retiring from the activities...Instead I would continue my role in the team as a mentor guiding my juniors, supporting them through tough time...And I don't know if they need me more or less, they are more mature now and should be able to face the problems which will potentially bring them down. I will just become a silent observer and only speak out when I see anything unusual. ~PEACE~ (^,^)v

Toastmaster

After 3 semesters, I’ve finally attained my ‘Competent Communicator’ rank in Toastmaster. I’ve learned a lot of public speaking skills from the great speaker and it’s been fun. I started as a shy person in the club until now I dare to volunteer to speak anytime. I felt a great change in myself.

Somehow I feel that achieving ‘Competent Communicator’ in Toastmaster is same as achieving black belt 1st-DAN in Taekwondo-it’s just the beginning of a new chapter in my life. There are lots more to learn. I recall all my previous speeches:

1. The Ice Breaker – Silent Stump?
I speak about how sports have turned me from an introvert person to a confident me.

2. Organize Your Speech – Sleepless Night
I talk about my experience as the group leader in Design Bureau of Chinese Cultural Night. The tiredness and frustration at the beginning that ended with joy and happiness.

3. Get to the Point – River Conservation
Well, environmental awareness =)

4. How to Say It – The Importance of Sports
You can tell by looking at the title!

5. Your Body Speaks – The Sunshine Joy
I shared my wonder Outward Bound School experience with them.

6. Vocal Variety – A Day Spent in the Beach
A story I made to allow me to use lots and lots of conversation.

7. Research Your Topic – Survival of the Fittest
I talked about how are babies born (which made a lot of laughter) and the Theory of Evolution.

8. Get Comfortable with Visual Aids – PRO-bins
I introduced new recycling concept, PRO-bins which is initiated by my final year seniors.

9. Persuade with Power – Global Warming
Environmental issues…

10. Inspire Your Audience – The Spirit of Sports
I talked about my participation in sports and the experience with Ah Ma, Ah Mii and Ah Tong.


And yes, I get RM400 pocket money from my sponsor for the 10 speeches…Yeah~!!!

"Survival of the fittest"~Charles Darwin

31 January 2010, Larian Gemilang...


Most of my college friends were expecting something big from me. Well, they always see me jogging at Bukit Cinta (well-known for the tough uphill slope). I was the first to register for the race...receipt no. 0001 !!!
The receipt


I finished 5th with 2 professional kenyans and 2 full time runner from PJ ahead (4 of them were walk-in registered). I am proud of myself. 10km in 48minutes without regular practice. I received the loudest cheers from my supporters and some of them told me that I could have won some prize money if they don't accept the kenyans. I was unhappy to hear that...I was thinking,"This is typical Malaysian mentallity, how are we going to improve if we don't rise the standard of our sports? They are the ones who can simulate the nation's spirit to fight!!!"

Somehow I felt pity to those Kenyans, running is their only way to earn a living. As for Malaysians, we can find other jobs besides being a sportsperson. We run for fun but they run to survive. Their country were too poor to prepare enough job opportunities so representing their country is their only option. When you are desperated, you will strive upon your limit. That's why Malaysian cannot excel in sports. Our country is too peaceful and you won't die even if you don't work!


Hamper for 5th place =)
I enjoyed this race pretty much and sort of reminds me of the time I ran for school team~PEACE (^,^)v

The Chemistry of People~1

MK(Malam Kebudayaan) is just around the corner. From the past, I knew that things won't go on smoothly. And it happened. As usual, my team are practicing our diabolo songs for the night. We are seriously running out of time. One person have more than one activity on the go, somehow they find hard to squeeze out their time for practice and they are lagging behind. And my worst nightmare occur. Sir went outstation for a week which left us, the 2nd years to guide the 1st years. The 2nd year manage to keep out with time but my juniors didn't. They have been practising for 3 weeks and still unable to catch up with sir's requirement. Since sir was not around, the 2nd years decided to change the whole thing(to make it more simple). One week after that, they still unable to fit in the song and sir had returned. Off course, sir said some harsh words to juniors and his words had hit them really hard. I started to feel that things are falling apart, MK is just one week from now...

Somehow I think that I have the responsibility on this incident. Am I not doing my job as a assistant captain? We had a post mortem last night and we wanted juniors to speak out their problems...it turned out that they don't blame us, instead we were too pampering them. They rely too much on us. But after I settled down, I begin to think that "Even chemical reactions involve at least two reactants. How a chemical reaction would take place if there is only one reactant?" I've done my best to train them...and it's time for them to grow up. After all, they are university students too, adults...no longer children. They must learn and take it as a lesson. Nevertheless, I hope the sharing last night can enlighten the fire and spirit in them and walk on to the stage as a team.

One week left, and I hope that the chemistry of sharing yesterday can bring up the whole team again.

100% effort doesn’t mean 100% success

I always think…if only I can go back in time…if…

But the fact is what I can do is to accept the truth that the thing had happened. I'm not a perfectionist but I get frustrated when things don't meet my expectation...worst still when that thing affects others...due to my carelessness... Telling myself I must perform well and do better for my team but the more I try, the more I fail to reach my aim. Am I setting my goal too high or the aims can only be achieved in my dreams…and dreams remain as dreams…

And why people always want something big from me? I have things that I’m passionate about and sometimes I have to give up in order to give in. I never want anything in return but don’t just take me for granted. I’m a normal human being, an ordinary person who just want to lead a simple and happy life. That’s just the thing I’m looking for, it’s not hard after all. Why???

(wrote with frustration)

~Past and Present~

Oldmates, old times, sweet and sour memories shall never die,
the time we ruled the tracks shall never fly...

Design, diabolo with you I share my love,
the future is ours and let's enjoy it together...

Sukmum brings back my old times and MK writes down a new chapter in my life...

Whatever the future will be I will always be ready...

Old passion and new love I couldn't decide so I will have them both...

Just bless me with no ghosts from the past will haunt me...

If this is the road not taken then I will challenge myself to it...

Telling myself happiness and accomplishment awaits my in the end then shall be it...